Better Not Bitter
Written by Bethany Lethbridge
On a recent trip to the thrift store, my husband, Timothy, purchased a game of Chess. I had never played before, but he thought it could be something fun for us to learn and do together.
So far, I have only played a handful of times, and while it has been fun, it has also been frustrating. The task of learning something new is interesting, and there is a desire to want to excel. However, as the old adage goes, 'you win some, you lose some'. It's 'the losing some', that is not so fun.
While I do my best to try and visualize the outcome of my opponent's next move, sometimes I am blinded to it and move one of my pieces into a position that opens myself up to an attack.
In those situations, my tendency is to shrink back, retreat, not want to play, and feel foolish for making such a silly mistake that I could have prevented if I had taken more care. Sometimes it can be hard to see failures in a positive light--to see them as learning lessons for the future. But that is what they are, if we choose to learn from them.
My family is currently working through a difficult situation that we did not see coming. In many ways, it feels like an attack. A failure, perhaps on our part, to put trust in who we thought were friends. While it is easy to feel hurt and mistreated, our prayer is that, through this, God will make us better and not bitter.
No experience, trial, or situation is ever wasted because we know that "in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose (Roman's 8:28)."
Though we do not always know why we go through the things we do, we can either learn from them and get better, or we can hold grudges, harbour unforgiveness and get bitter.
If I had quit playing Chess because I lost my first game, I would have deprived myself of that time with my husband and the opportunity to learn and grow and become better at something new.
When people hurt us, especially believers and those who are meant to be friends, it is easy to want to put our guard up around everyone, and to close ourselves off. If we do that though, we can miss out on other beautiful, life-giving friendships and opportunities.
We cannot always control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond to it. Let us respond with grace. Let us get better and not bitter, knowing that God is with us. He never leaves us nor forsakes us, and He works all things for the good of those who love Him.
